I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
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