I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
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