she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
