"it" just moved
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
