I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
