It's chlamydia! Thank God!
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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