whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
