What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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