That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
