It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
