We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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