I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize