420 ftw
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
