Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
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