So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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