The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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