Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
