I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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