Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
