My girlfriend figured out who you are.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
