Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
