I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
is that a dick in a sweater?
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