And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
this hospital has no fireball
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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