I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
This is my gift to your gina
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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