I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
