mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
