i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
