i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Randomize
