There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
