In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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