I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
