oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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