**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
