I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
