shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
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