this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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