how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
