is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
You were trust falling into bushes
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
