I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
