He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize