i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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