Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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