I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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