ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
