I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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