PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize