I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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