and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
