It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
