FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You pole danced in your parka.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
