My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
